I look at you - laughing as if there's no bother in the world that can ever make you frown, feeling my gaze and looking at me questionably, calling my name, trying to shake me out of my reverie, failing to realize that its you who I am actually into, not an oblivion, not any dream. Its you who has me so caught up and mesmerized. You, whom I never want to forget. You I look at and smile, subtly trying to capture all the emotions and actions that I know will fade one day...just like everything else.
Never ever have I hated time so much. Never ever felt that desperate urge to smash the clock and stop its rhythmic, almost hypnotic ticking forever. I already see you blurring around the edges, making me feel exactly how helpless I am in front of time. Face heated up, scrunched up in concentration not to ruin this perfect moment of bliss, I wonder if I'll ever forgive time again...for helping me through, for taking this away, for making all these days just a blurry image of a forgotten past, for making YOU so hazy, so distant, that I would be forced to question whether WE actually ever existed.
The worst part would be seeing you and feeling nothing... when once, now, it's hard to even see tomorrow without you. Time can do that to you. Time can give you hope to live again. But is that what you really need? Is that what you want? A life where you don't even remember who made it worth living?
Him: Its such a weird feeling you know...having so many close friends.
Me: Oh, I wouldn't know. I've only had you.
Comments
take care.. :)
Nicely penned!